Balancing myself

Last wednesday was went out in big group to Kulim for dinner. Surprisingly ST was joined us as well, because ahe told me that she wanted to go Halo to see Tank. Kingfisher and Kenny purposely arranged her to sit beside me (i think most of them knowing that i like ST). I tried to start some topics with ST but seem i still couldnt talk with ST freely like others. Instead, i joked more with Sagi and Tcgien, same for ST, she talked and joked with them more.

I really dont know that how to attract her attention. I am really sucks in talking with the girl i like. Kingfisher and Kenny said that i am too caring about her feeling, worrying i would say something that offended her, thats why i could talk freely with her. Well, i admit that, this is what i should take care and change. Relax and let everything be natural, dont expect too much, but keep myself motivated and caring her. This really sound hard ya.

Saturday i went to Eden handicap center charity sales with Kooiyen and chunjin. After that i went to autocity to see car roadshow, met Kenny, Kingfisher, and Xiaowenzai there. ST was working on her assignment on Island and said that might find us if she finished early. However, everyone wanted to go home early, so i called Chamelleon and Panda out to have a night tea. We chat until 11.30pm, but didnt get any news from ST. Thus we dismissed and went home.

Sunday i went out with Chamelleon, egg, adeline and Panda to Redbox. I called ST up but she said she not yet finished her assignment and need to work on it until night. In noon i got her sms saying that she would have programme shooting (their assignment is shooting a programme aka Amazing race, did i mention that she is studying Broadcasting? ) just outside gurney plaza. After singing we went to the place they work. They were seem quite professional, with all the equipments, scripts, director... of course, i saw ST :) but i didnt go down as they were busy and was not so convenient to me. But Chamelleon them went down and said hi to her. I just waved hand to her and she responsed to me as well. A short moment later we left the place.

I trying to not go too agressive on her as i feel this will scare her away. I need to balance myself between my feel and action while taking care her feeling as well. I dont know whether this is the right way, but, this is the best way i can think of. I am not daring enough to go straight forward as this will make both of us feel embarass especially if she is not interest on me at all.

Anyway, i need to keep telling myself that let everything be natural, dont expect too much..... hmmm... a phrase that i not really like actually...